Sunday, September 13, 2015

Septermber 13th, 2015 - When You're Fed Up With UNIV100

     The following is an assignment from my UNIV100 class at UMD. The question posed was: "how was you week... What was the high point? What was the low point?"
     This is my response to that question:
In the general sense of the word, "mediocre" would seem apt as far as describing my week, if we consider how my week was as a summation of all of the positive and negative events and occurrences during the duration of the past seven days. If I were to go into details, I would feel obligated to include primarily negative data points towards my answer, probably because, due to a psychological concept known as The Hedonistic Thermometer (as described by Barry Schwartz in his book, The Paradox of Choice), wherein it is stated that the human adjusts to happiness quickly, establishing that level of happiness as the base layer of judging mood and emotion, such to the effect of my only remembering the bad things that have happened in the past week. Despite this unfortunate per-disposition, I will attempt to objectively relay my week. The high of my week was probably receiving my fencing epee in the mail despite the hassle it took to receive it in the university postage system, and being able to use it in fencing practice. The low point of the week is definitely more of a competition, with the Final Four consisting of missing my Friday Physics lecture because I slept in, being crushed under the ever growing wave of homework that primarily involves reading copious amounts of text with a precise eye, at roughly 20-40 pages a night, the resultant social issues of having an intrinsically pungent room (what's to be expected when two guys live in one room?), and a more general existential crisis that revolves around the fact that I came to the University of Maryland to study engineering, and yet the majority of my time is being spent appeasing the malignant gods of the humanities.
     I hope you all have a lovely week.
DFTBA

Wednesday, September 9, 2015

September 9th, 2015 - Pancake Diner pt. 2

Here's part 2 of the short story I've been writing, Pancake Diner:
     

Mark broke it first. “Did…did she just tell us something about herself without any kind of coercing or conniving necessary?”
“I think she did. What does this mean? Is it one of seven signs of the apocalypse or something?”
Mark glanced out the window. “Maybe, but I don’t see anything apocalyptic going on outside.”
Amber kicked me underneath the table, catching me right in the shin, and cutting my laugh off in the middle. I looked at her and she gave me a wink, but not your ordinary “ha-ha, I just hit you for laughing” wink. When Amber winked, it was like the very gods (or goddesses, for Mark’s sake) had come down from heaven just to grace this one shutting and reopening of an eye lid. Her sage green eyes would sparkle, and as one eye was covered by her hair, you could just see the corner of her mouth curl up into a, as Dan puts it, knock-your-socks-off smile. Even though she was a quiet person, she only ever had to wink to be a flirt. The involuntary grunt I made from getting my shin bruised seemed to rouse Dan from his shock-induced coma, and he exclaimed.
“We’ve got to put Amber into a fighting competition!” All the sudden outbursts seemed to have attracted Marge’s attention as she returned to our table.
“Is everything alright over here?” She asked, as I felt my understanding of the word “disgruntled” expand vastly.
            “Yeah, we’re fine, Marge. Thanks for asking,” Mark said, as if the rap battle had somehow unlocked a confidence that the yesterday Mark never displayed.
            “Anything wrong with the food?” Marge gestured to our four untouched plates of pancakes.
            “Oh, no. It’s fine,” I quickly replied. “We’ve just been a little distracted from eating.” Marge made no sign of hearing, turning away from the table to return to her post behind the counter of the diner.
“Dan, we shouldn’t enter Amber into a fighting competition. That makes it sound like she’s an animal-“
“Which would make it dog fighting or cock fighting.” Mark added.
“And that’s horrifically wrong. Besides, fighting competitions are, like, incredibly dangerous, right?” I asked Amber.
“If you’re going solely off of The Karate Kid, sure,” Dan quipped, rousing a bout of laughter from the rest of us.
“While Daniel-san’s is a rare case,” Amber started, taking a drink of water, “Nate’s not totally wrong. People can get easily and seriously hurt during those things.” She gave me a quick smile, then she went back to eating her pancakes.
“But she’s awesome at it! She could totally win!” Dan retorted. Time for a miracle, I thought, as I made eye contact with Amber and Mark.
“I haven’t had a lesson in four years, Dan. The people in the competitions have been training since they were like five years old, and they haven’t had a knee surgery.” She took another bite of pancake.
“But…” Dan looked at Mark, who shook his head.
“But…” he looked to me, and I mimicked Mark.
“Sorry, dude. That’s 3 to 1, and you agreed at the spring festival that you need at least 50% of the group to agree for us to try one of your ideas.” Dan sighed, and he looked almost visibly deflated.
“Alright.” He mumbled.
Holy. Crap. For the first time in three years, we successfully convinced Dan away from a crazy, hair-brained idea. The last time was when Dan wanted us to come to his grandparents’ house over the summer and try deep-sea fishing. To be fair, our parents shot that one down, but in our minds, it still counted.
            “So, it’s three in the morning, and we’re eating pancakes in a 24-hour diner,” Mark began. “How on earth did we get here? Didn’t today start with a spring festival at school?”
“Yeah, but I think we all know why we left,” Dan smirked. “Nate asked us to leave, and so we took a vote, and he won. That took us to the police station to bail out Amber’s boyfriend.”
“Hey, by the way, how many vandalism charges does it take to rack up a three thousand dollar bail?” I shot him a look, knowing Amber wasn’t too happy about that being brought up. He saw it, glanced at Amber, and cleared his throat. “Wh-which is why we need to find a way to get money,” Mark nodded to Dan, and the dug into his pancakes. Dan picked up the conversation baton.
“That’s when I found out about the rap battle! We went to the abandoned warehouse–“
“Such a stereotypical place to host a rap battle,”  interjected Amber.
“And Mark entered himself into the competition.” Which was a huge surprise to all of us.
“From there, Mark went through a couple rounds, and then when it came time for the final round, we got our asses handed to us by Michael and George, rapper and hypeman duo extraordinaire.” I said. 

See y'all around!
DFTBA

Tuesday, September 1, 2015

August 31st, 2015 - The Start of Classes... BUM BUM BUUUUUM!!!


                 Today could only be described as an auspicious day: my first day of college classes. Its cool to think that college has started for real now, until I realized that this means my crazy adventures will probably be reduced in number and frequency for a little while. Especially since I’ll be spending a ton of time reading a bunch of classic novels (for this week, its Mary Shelley’s Frankenstein), writing countless papers, and solving endless amounts of physics and chemistry problems. Luckily for me, I’m going to be loving almost every single second of it. Because I’m super weird like that. Anyways… I walked into the wrong lecture hall today for physics (which I share with Stu). I went from having a great seat -left-handed desk, right near the front of the hall- to having a crappy seat –right-handed desk literally at the back of the class- which sucked, but not as much as being told that I lugged my physics text book for a mile for no reason. And that I have to purchase another $60-$90 of material for classes. Yeah college…
                My Carrilon course was alright, until we were assigned to read 68 pages in two days… and chemistry was really exciting! Then I checked the assignment schedule, and I felt an almost physical pain… But I’m still psyched for school! Especially since I get to be assigned even more work tomorrow with my next day of classes! Hooray! I’ll move on to talk about other things instead of focusing on the negative…
Today was my first trip to the all-you-can-eat 251 North, where I ran into a bunch of friends from high school that are now sophomores at College Park, though the real joy was confusing and startling Stu, Chaney, Q, and Co. when the Urbana kids crowded an old drum major from marching band, making a public seen. After dinner, my mom came down from Frederick to bring me my bike, and help me get a shelf for my room, amongst other things. Off to IKEA I went! Now I have a 50 lb. package of high stakes LEGOs sitting under my bed, needing to be assembled. Upon returning, I had found movie night was in full swing, with tonight’s selection being Big Hero 6, a heart-warming film that blatantly ignores the laws of physics and chemistry and biology, never mind air traffic control regulations when they were flying around that futuristic San Francisco, an area that I can only assume to be a strict no-fly zone.
Well, I need to sleep, so it’s time for bed tonight…
DFTBA

Saturday, August 29, 2015

August 28th, 2015 - A Day of Readying



     The day began with an alarming wake up at 7:45 (alarming because of the alarm I set). Q stayed asleep, but I began the day, setting what I now realize would be my morning routine for the next year, potentially longer. Nourishment came in the form of a granola bar for breakfast, and I met up with Weddle and Stu. A couple friends were moving in a quad over, so we went to help them. We first found Elie, a Tech God and fellow Eagle Scout, along with his family. We made short work of his things, and stampeded down the stairs to the lobby, detouring the hectic and sporadic behavior of the Move-In Day Elevators. Quickly finding Tim, a good man for a joke, and his kin. Once again to work we went, wasting no time in our brief foray as a moving crew. As we waited for Kev, the last of the Triple of La Plata, a somewhat passionate conversation struck up on the topic of the video games we’ve missed playing in the short time we’ve been gone from Home. Unfortunately for Kev, the move in window closed, and so we took our leave of the Ellicott Quad, returning home briefly to watch Dirty Jobs with Mike Rowe (a valuable reminder of why we needed to stay in college), and preparing for the day’s Adventure: Classroom Scouting. It didn’t take long, and we didn’t have much trouble in finding our way around. Not much to tell really on this Adventure, except that President Loh’s parking job was… a little off kilter, but to me rang as an important reminder: all the staff here are people, fallible and imperfect, and therefore easier to approach than I may think.
                Speaking of Dr. Loh, he gave an absolutely amazing and inspiring speech at today’s New Student Welcome. I keep finding myself more and more pumped for the start of classes, because I am so ready for the learning and discovery that this place is going to offer me. After the Welcome, Weddle, Elie, Kev, and I returned to their room for a few games of Smash, where I began to get into the swing of using Marth, my old stand-by in the Smash series. At 23:00, we went to The Stamp to watch Avengers 2®. On the walk home, Weddle and I talked with old friends turned to new again.
I don’t have as many stories to tell tonight, and I kind of want to get some measure of rest tonight, so I’ll think I’ll wrap this up here.
See y'all later
DFTBA